Happy Blogaversary

Today is the one year anniversary of my blog. I’ve stuck my first post up on the top for the occasion. Last Halloween, I had thoughts coursing through my head like nobody’s business there was so much to do as there is every Halloween. I needed a place for overflow. I wanted a place to explore provocative themes; experiences both tender and contemptuous; variations on meter, alliteration, adjective use, tone; to dump all the gobbledy gook that clutters my thoughts. I basically set this thing up for me. I didn’t expect too many visitors, and really, haven’t had tons. That’s okay.

I’ve been writing poetry since 1991. I would doodle pictures in spiral bound books to go along with the poems. I felt it was time to centralize all (almost all) of my material, keep it better organized and move it into the 21st century. I’ve never essayed to publish them. I do not care about being famous or recognized. My only hopes are to meet people who may understand it, or who write in a way that I appreciate and understand. I used to show my work to people I thought might appreciate it. Only a few have. I really don’t show it to anyone anymore.

My local circle of influence is shallow, and I really don’t want to expose what I consider my best talent for fear of rejection…or worse, indifference. I am content to be perceived as a mediocre hack who doesn’t do much of anything talent-wise. When asked what I am up to lately, there isn’t much to report aside from the daily chores of life. What I put here represents one of my very few hobbies. If I were to continue announcing what I do to people around me, I would continue to get their eyes glazing over, or if they are interested, perhaps it’s not the type of work they find inspiring to them. There is good writing out there that bores me. It’s still good and skillful, but not of interest to me. So I fear that if someone is actually genuinely interested at first, they may ultimately be let down. In a way, the last year writing here has been cathartic.

I am finally learning to keep my mouth shut, and keep parts of myself hidden, whereas, usually, I am an open book, honest and shamelessly revealing. I’ve learned that people don’t appreciate honesty, even if it’s me being honest about myself good or bad. I’ve learned that social graces require a level of superficiality that I cannot muster. But it’s gotta go somewhere outside of me, and if there is an audience for that, cool. But I hadn’t intended this blog to be a platform for anything but a shelf for my brain.

I appreciate all the people who check in regularly, leave comments, or even silently read, enjoy and leave. I appreciate all the good work I have managed to find on WordPress. I wish I had the time to sort through everything more thoroughly to find the diamonds in the rough. I love referrals to good work if you have them. I love it when people drop in for some healthy discourse, even if we don’t agree. As a toast to the anniversary I had thought about writing a macabre Halloween type poem, but there’s too much to do at the moment. Perhaps tonight…. perhaps.

Published in: on October 25, 2009 at 12:10 pm  Comments (3)  
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Pencil Fanged

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There is something about clenching a writing tool in my mouth that makes me a more pensive and hurriedly productive writer. There is something about perching a writing tool atop my ear that makes me feel like a sloppy, stressed-out journalist. There is something about putting a writing tool in my hair that makes me all business and no play, but that pencil is well within reach and able to be removed in a hurry. There is something about lacking a writing tool that makes me feel vulnerable.

Published in: on March 13, 2009 at 5:34 pm  Comments (11)  
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